tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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