I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
