these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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