ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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