No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
