You're so nebulous sometimes
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
