you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
