Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
