Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
