It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
