Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
