i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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