How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
you never un-have a 4some
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
