And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
