Yo dont text me then not text me
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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