Barsexuality is the new black.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
