i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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