Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
