Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
