i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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