End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
