So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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