you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
