hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
