Sry I called you an 8
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
