You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize