why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Randomize
