CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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