Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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