So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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