We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
