Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Randomize
