So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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