you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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