Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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