They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
