Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
