Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
