We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
