Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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