In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
