My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
