Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
