Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
