My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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