Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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