Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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