I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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