shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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