I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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