She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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