i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
